Schnozberries
by darksadlonelyknight
Summary: What happens when Batman receives a surprise visitor? I made up a few of my own candy puns so they'll be in italics. Once more, reviews are always appreciated and I hope you all enjoy Batman x Sweet Tooth.


**Schnozberries**

Bruce Wayne heaved out a heavy sigh as he plopped himself on his couch, clearly exhausted from the hard day of saving Gotham. He began rubbing his aching feet in an attempt to make the throbbing decrease, but to no avail. He grunted at the pain as his butler walked into the room.

"Good evening, sir. I hope you've had a successful day out there." Alfred cheerily addressed him as he positioned a pillow underneath Bruce's head.

"It was successful, Alfred. Successful… but tiring." He answered as he closed his eyes. "Do you have any hot plans for tonight?"

"Actually, sir tonight is the night I am going off to stop Two Face." He explained as he tidied up the room. "And while I'm out, Dick is going to run some errands to attempt and make his costume even more aerodynamic. I swear the determination in that young lad is like nothing I've ever seen."

Bruce sat up in confusion. "But, Alfred… if you and Dick are out, what am I going to do?" After Robin had joined him in fighting crime, he forgot what it was like to be alone.

"Sir, we're giving you the night off. Do whatever you feel like- you can watch a movie, or you can even take a bath. Heroes like you deserve some bubbles on their skin."

"But Al-"

"Sir, please. Enjoy a night to yourself. I'll be out a while, and I'm not sure how long Dick will be. I wouldn't wait up if I were you."

Bruce sat staring at the ground processing all of the information. He hadn't had a night off in the longest time, and after hearing his body crack with every movement, he decided he needed one.

"Okay… okay. Thanks, Alfred." He smiled at his butler and laid himself back down on the couch and closed his eyes once more. He drifted off to sleep as he heard the front door slam shut.

He had been asleep for about an hour when he awoke to a crash come from below him. He sat straight up and tried to listen for any hints as to what it could have been.

"…I'm on the ground floor right now…" He thought out loud to himself. "So… that must mean that somebody is… IN THE BAT CAVE." He shouted his last words as he sprinted down the stairs to inspect the situation.

When he finally reached the bat cave, everything looked normal. He found his bat mask and placed it on his head. Nothing was out of place, nothing was stolen, and everything was silent… too silent.

"Huh, I guess nobody is down here…" He chuckled to himself, but as he began to retreat back to the couch, he heard a voice behind him.

"Well, actually, no. You aren't alone."

Batman quickly spun around to find himself face to face with the one and only Sweet Tooth.

"Oh, bat boy. It sure does look like you're up to your old _twix_." He laughed as he threw a candy bar at the man's feet. He twirled as if he was showing off a new outfit. "Surprised?"

Batman just stood there, unable to assess the situation before him. "I-I… Well, yeah, I am. I thought you were dead! I watched you fall into the vat of…" He started before he was cut off.

"…vat of boiling hot chocolate. Yeah, I know. You see, Batman, you ran away to save your precious little city before you could witness my impressive feat of grabbing a hook and swinging myself to safety." He finished with a little bow.

Batman stared at the evil man with utter confusion. "Then… What are you doing here?"

Sweet Tooth laughed and stepped closer to the man opposite him. "Actually, I'm here on a different set of business than you think. I actually have a few questions for you."

"And why should I answer anything you have to ask me."

Sweet Tooth snickered at his question. "'Cause these are different questions than you think."

Batman stared at the candy man before him trying to decipher what he was telling him. He hesitated before saying, "Okay. Try me."

Sweet Tooth just smiled and began to walk away from him. He made himself at home, casually glancing around and taking in his surroundings. "So, that Robin kid, you really like him. Don't you?"

_He's right- these are different questions._ Bruce thought. "Uh… yeah, I really do. He's my best friend."

Sweet Tooth smirked to himself. "He's your best friend? Bat, I've seen the way you look at him- you think of him to be more of a _Dove_ than a Robin." He explained and threw the chocolate at the man's feet.

Bruce stiffened and began to fidget from being uncomfortable. Was Sweet Tooth right? Did he like Robin… like that? No, no he doesn't. He is just a friend. "Why does it matter to you anyway?! This is none of your business!"

"Oh, a bit defensive, are we?" He asked before continuing. "Batman, did you know the mammal with the highest rate of homosexuality is the bat?"

This question just caused him to squirm more. "No, no I did not know that."

Sweet Tooth smirked once more at his nerves. "Why so nervous? We're just talking about your best friend, Robin. It's not like we're talking about me or anything." He made eye contact with the hero on the last statement. "Or are we?"

"What the fuck are you going on about, Sweet Tooth."

"Oh come on, Batman. Give me a break; I'm not a _sucker_." He started with as he placed a Kit Kat and a lollipop on a nearby table. "I've seen the way you looked at me whenever we faced each other. Face it; you think I'm a _Big Hunk._" He placed the candy car on the same table and smiled brightly at the other man.

Batman gawked back at the other man. How could he possibly think that he had feelings for him?! That's- that's just not possible. "You're fucking crazy. I've never felt that way about you or any other guy before. I'd hate to crush your little plans, but it's true." He smirked back at the man confidently. "Perhaps, it is you who feels that way about me."

Sweet Tooth stared back at the man for a minute, thinking about his last question. He let out a big sigh. "You could be right, bat. I mean, _look _at you." He began and set down his next candy bar. "You're the most loved man in Gotham, you're filthy rich, and you're gorgeous."

Batman could not believe what he was hearing. He was bluffing when he said that to Sweet Tooth. That man was actually attracted to him? He had never thought about Sweet Tooth like that before. _Well, he is a very good-looking man… _he thought to himself. _WHAT. NO, STOP IT. BRUCE, YOU DO NOT LIKE MEN LIKE THAT- ESPECIALLY EVIL ONES THAT TRIED TO KILL YOUR BEST FRIEND._

Sweet Tooth interrupted Bruce's thoughts when he continued speaking. "Do you understand what it felt like to be restrained by you? I've never felt that… bothered before. Not by any girl, and surely not by Candy. You did that to me. I knew you'd never reciprocate, until you wrestled me and started to spank me…" He looked up at Bruce seductively. "That's when I knew you felt the same way about me."

Sweet Tooth had a point. He never _had_ to spank him. He didn't understand what came over him then… he just felt like he really wanted to spank him. Bruce began to rub the back of his neck in confusion and a little embarrassment.

"You know I'm right, too." Sweet Tooth began to walk towards Bruce, who started back pedaling in response. "And who could ever forget when you were grabbing me by my shirt and our faces were inches apart. You had to have felt the spark there- it was too strong for just me to feel." Bruce continued to back pedal until his back hit the wall. He was now pinned between the wall and the other man.

Batman's body began to heat up from the situation. Having Sweet Tooth so close to him, added with him not being able to move was really… hot. He stared into the villain's lust filled eyes and realized his own eyes had the same glaze over them. Sweet Tooth trailed his fingers up Bruce's arms, leaving goose bumps trailing behind them.

Sweet Tooth leaned in so his face was a small amount of inches away from Batman's. "So, tell me, Batman. Do the schnozberries taste like schnozberries?" He grinned at him and seductively licked his top teeth.

This was enough to send Batman over the edge. He grabbed Sweet Tooth's face and pulled it towards his until their lips met. Sweet Tooth reciprocated almost immediately, deepening the kiss right away. Bruce knotted his hands in Sweet Tooth's cotton-candy blue hair while Sweet Tooth held on to the back of the other man's neck. Batman opened his mouth to allow Sweet Tooth inside and soon they found their tongues fighting for dominance.

After a few minutes, they broke the kiss. They leaned their foreheads against each other's as they attempted to catch their breath.

"So…" Sweet Tooth smiled. "What'd you think?"

Batman heaved a few more breaths before returning his own smile. "I think that the schnozberries do taste like schnozberries… and that they taste fucking delicious."

Sweet Tooth began to laugh before he was cut off with Bruce's mouth meeting his again. They both found out that night that the connection between them was hotter than any vat of boiling hot chocolate.


End file.
